The Peach Pit

You kitty bloggers is making mama cry

2008-10-15T17:42:00.000-07:00

Kitty-buddies,
Mama is so happy to see that you remembered Miss Simone's Purrthday! Miss Simone is sure getting old...she was old as dirt, now she is older than dirt. She turned 17 last month. And she is crazier than ever. She's taken up residence in the laundry room because she's forgetting to use her box like a normal kitty and she's still getting her stupid baths. The staff needs to keep their eyes on her 24/7 cuz there is no telling what she might do!

I haven't been blogging, but I have loved your encouragement. There just was nothing happening to me. My imprisonment continues. I only get to on supervised walks around the prison, ehm, back yard once a day, on a good day. Now I can't even go into the bedrooms and sleep on Mama's bed because everyone's allergies are acting up and I'm "too furry." Whatever. I'm gorgeous and you know it. Life just isn't exciting when a man-cat is limited to one floor and the rest of beans have a whole house and world outside to explore!

My latest news is my big adventure. I am visiting my cousin-cats, Princess and Jack. Mama is watching them while their Mama (Mama's cousin) is visiting the grate state of Virginia. I thought I'd come along for the ride, since I was going a bit stir crazy. My cousins are not being the best hosts. Princess is just being a girl. What do you expect? I live with two of them so I understand and don't take the hissing personally. Jack-Man, though, I thought he'd be cool. It's just taking some time for him to warm up to me. I hope that we can have some real man-cat fun by the end of the week. Mama said that no kitty would play with me if I kept hiding under the bed (not hiding, I told her...staking out the territory and planning my attack strategies for when Jack decides to play with me. Mamas don't understand.)

Here's ME, then Jack is the one on the right with the gorgeous tail like me and Princess is the pouty one on the left. Mama tells me she's sweet, but I haven't seen that side of her yet.

Me 'n Jack, our first attempt at playing

They live on the first floor and have a balcony with a view of all the interesting things going in the 'partment complex. What I want to know is, Why can't I go to the beach? I can smell the fresh beach-y air calling me and Jack told me that kitties can't go to the beach unless we know how to play volleyball. Hmmm... what's volleyball?

Is it me or is Jack checkin' out the night?

I gotta go because Mama wants to watch the debate. Silly. I already know who I am voting for and so does she. Maybe Jack and Princess are swing voters?

I will try to get back to blogging and catching up with you. Mama has just been busy and I've had no life.

Peach "Britney Spears" Man Cat, or How I Ended Up in Psychiatric Lockdown for Life

2008-02-08T10:31:00.000-08:00

Here's the story of how I became a "Lifer". I can never, ever, go outside again. I think it's a pretty harsh sentence. But maybe Mama isn't serious and I'll just have pay my Lenten penance and in less than 40 days, I'll be free again. (Scout is giving up football and Simone is giving up baths, so I'm giving up going outside, maybe).

According to the lying, conniving neighbors, I am a violent criminal who needs to be taken off the streets.
You all know I am not a violent criminal. I didn't even get a fair trial. That proves my earlier point about the election. No equal rights for cats.

My alleged crimes: 3 counts of breaking and entering, 2 counts of terrorism and attempted assault, 4 counts of vandalism
I am accused of entering the neighbors' house via the old doggie door and beating up the two indoor cats. When they closed the doggie door. I ripped up 2 screen doors and 2 window screens trying to get back in the house and scare the cats. This occurred over a period of months until they finally caught me and called Mama. She came and got me and marched me straight home. Then went back to talk to the neighbors. She says I am very lucky that she didn't have to pay for the damages. Otherwise... Well, I don't know what "otherwise." She would have taken me to the pound?! Yeah right. She loves me so much she can't stand it.

Obviously, I didn't do it. I didn't want to scare the cats. I wanted to play with them. And even if I did do it, they had it coming. Maybe the coyote ripped up the screens or a possum or a raccoon. Just because the screens looked like exact replicas of my box, doesn't mean I did it. Just because there was white fur in the house, doesn't mean it was mine. I demand DNA testing! Where are the CCSIs?

Now I have to stay inside for life. The neighbors want to replace their screens and Mama can't vouch for my actions. So she's keeping me inside. I have been so depressed. I have days where I don't even get up for breakfast in the morning and mope around all day. My life is over!!

Mama says that Aunt Nancy's vet knows of medicines to help me. I am not always aggressive. I'm not mean. I never hiss at anybody or use my claws in a fight. I'm just persistent. I get really hyper and can't control myself. Then I get really depressed and can't move or eat. Maybe there is better living through chemistry for me. All I know is, that I understand how Britney feels.

Super Fat Tuesday!

2008-02-05T11:42:00.000-08:00

It's FAT TUESDAY and SUPER TUESDAY! Since I'm a California kitty I get celebrate both. Although we are all still deaf from all the screaming that went on Sunday we are ready for more partying. We love a party! And if it means more treats....

I voted too! SEE:
Here's my, I'm proud to be a voter face.
And here's my, "What do you mean my vote doesn't count face?"
And finally, I realized, that the country is going to $^&%*^* in a handbasket so I might as well resign myself. No one ever considers cats' rights do they?
Whew! I was such an emotional morning! But now I'm proudly wearing my voting sticker AND my carnival costume, so the day should be better all around. And Mama's in a good mood because she finally got to vote for real for the first time since she was 18. She didn't have to send her ballot in from some foreign country like Germany or Austria or New York. She got to punch out her ballot, chads and all.

Getting ready for the BIG GAME!

2008-02-02T17:22:00.000-08:00

WE are ready! Scout is preparing her chair. I've got my "box" seat just like I want it. Simone says, "Can't we just have a tea party?"

It's a tragedy that our SAINTS didn't make it...but we will have a fun day no matter what! Chili for lunch, yum. Oh, wait, I'm not allowed to eat beef because I don't clean my litterbox. Well, I can beg anyway.

I just wanted to post that great picture once more (and it's also good for celebrating MARDI GRAS):

P.S. Everybody, we are just fine. Nobody died or got sick or anything. We are just having major staffing problems. I told Scout we should hire a temp, but she couldn't get off her chair long enough to look for applicants. We had a good Christmas with lots of presents and treats, rang in the New Year with costumes, Jimmy Joe's mama, Auntie Anne, came to see me because she missed me so, and Scout turned 14 on January 17. The biggest news of all is that now I have to be an indoor kitty for the REST OF MY LIFE. It is a travesty. I'm innocent. I didn't do what they said I did. But, I'll blog about that later. Now I want to get back on the blogosphere and catch up with all my long-lost friends.

Sick Day

2007-12-15T13:15:00.000-08:00

We've been gone a while (more than a month!), but we'z back now. Not that anything 'specially good or bad happened. We just was too busy havin' fun.

Today I have a post appropriate for the SEASON. The FLU SEASON, that is. (Ha, everykitty thought I meant Christmas season.)

We are asking an important question about essential kitty duties: What is your purrsonality when it comes to taking care of sick beans?

Here's what happened to us:
On Monday night, Grandma and Mama started barfing. But when they barf, they don't feel better, they feel worse. I don't get it. Barfing always makes you feel better. Worse things happened. Then before we knew it, they were in bed and wouldn't get out. Here's how we took control of the situation (cuz you all know male-beans is useless).

Scout is indifferent. She doesn't do sick people. She's afraid of going into the bedroom and won't stick around to comfort a sickie if her life depends upon it. Pretty much this is what she did the whole time. Oh, and she grumbled that routines were messed up because Grandpa doesn't do things right.

Simone is the nursemaid. She has to make the rounds and check in on everyone at regular intervals. She won't stay long though, because she's got a lot to do. Two sick people to take care of is a lot for an old lady like her. She hardly spent any time at all in her chair. She was up and down the stairs, on and off the beds. Saying, "Are you ok, Are you ok?" She licks beans to test for fevers and paws at them to make sure they are still alive under all the blankies.

I am the angel. I am so good to sick people, I can hardly stand it. I sleep by them, I love 'em, and I watch out for 'em. That's all there is to say about that.

Mama: Excuse me Peach?! You are an opportunist. Why don't you tell the truth about how you are around sick people?

Ok, I admit. I work hard all day at my job. I don't have time to come home to sick people. So, I coincidentally crash on the bed. So what? It's the thought that counts. I also really like it when beans are sick because they can't defend themselves. It's a free for all on everything in the sick room---the glasses on the nightstand, earplugs, pills, bookmarks, oh, and you can't forget my favorite, the straws. I love the straws. Even if they are germy.

Now I wanna know, what is your purrsonality?

p.s. it is important to distinguish a stomach virus from flu virus. Everybuddy tell your beans to get Flu shots.

Tuxie Tuesday: Neighbors

2007-11-06T10:00:00.000-08:00

Today I am going to introduce my Neighbor and local TWIN, "Scouty II"/"Mittens"". Nobody really knows what her name is. She lived with a family and then they moved away and left her behind. The lady next door to that inhumane family took "Scouty II" in and named her Mittens. So, she responds to Mittens. But I call her Scouty II. She's my Twin. She's a few years younger than me and is just now starting to fill out in the grand tuxedo burrito shape.
Here she is the gorgeous girl:
And here's me again, for comparison. See, we're like sisters. But her fur is rougher and her eyes are yellower and my tail is more of a "radar" than hers.

Put Your Paws Up (Again)!

2007-11-05T16:48:00.000-08:00

We gotta thank you guys for the suggestions. The only one who doesn't thank you is La Reine Simone. She was so grumpy about the increased frequency of wipes and the introduction of washcloths. Her butt smells better (to our relief). She's still lookin' pretty darn scuzzy though.

There must be some miracle out there that we don't know about. Give her a few more days of intense cleaning and maybe she'll let me post her picture again.

The unfortunate victim here was Scout: she had her butt wiped too while Mama was at it. That was a shocker!

Mama needs to learn to keep her paws away from Spot #13.

Put Your Paws Up!

2007-11-03T16:30:00.000-07:00

Whose dirty paws are these?

They have been treated with these fine products on a regular basis:

And we recently added Miracle Coat to the routine because those paws were SO unbearably dirty...

Have you guessed who those fine "white" paws belong to??

yep, you guessed it!

Does anykitty have a suggestion on how to keep this girl clean? It might be too dangerous for her heart to go in a REAL bath. Though we all know she needs a good, long SOAK. Mama finally got her to eat again by giving her Meow Mix instead of Science Diet (Scout and I hover in the wings. We're the clean-up crew) , but this didn't solve her "I'm too old for this. You clean me" routine. She's totally given up on all grooming. EEWW! Scout and I won't touch her dirty paws with a ten-foot pole. That means Mama's got to bathe her. She's at her wits end with what to do. Good thing I'm easy.

I'm OK! I'm OK!

2007-10-23T14:25:00.000-07:00

I just wanted you kitties to know that I am A-OK. The wildfires in Southern California are near, but not that near. Completely the other side of the mountains toward the beach. For once, I'm glad to be a Valley Cat. We can see the smoke and the air isn't too good, but we're safe.

Mama says that I am a fool. I went outside yesterday and today (only for a little while). I was smelling so earthy that she had the nerve to wipe me down with one of Simone's stupid "calming" wipes.

I wish these FIRES would end. They are really cramping my style. Mama says I should feel sorry for the kitties and horsies and doggies that have to evacuate, but I just want to know if I can get some bar-b-qued wild conejito.

Thursday Thirteen: The Dalai Lama is a my kinda guy

2007-10-18T15:09:00.001-07:00

BY SCOUT

Last night I was watching my favorite program, The Newshour, or maybe it was my second favorite program, ABC Evening News. As you know, I like the music and the lap time. Last night there were quilts too! In any case, I saw the most interesting story that I just had to post about.

I am convinced that there are many interesting things about the Dalai Lama. Here's what I learned.

1. He's not a Llama. (Is your mama a llama?) . But rather a Lama, meaning spiritual teacher or guru.

2. He is a very gentle and peaceful man. I appreciate that. No need to do anything too quickly or without thought to whom you might hurt.

3. His real home is in Lhasa, Tibet. Dalai Lamas have lived there for squillions of years.

4. But he has to live in Exile. This is very sad. I bet he would like to go home and sleep on his own special chair and not some borrowed chair somewhere in India (where is India, anyway?).

5. He is the reincarnation of the previous Dalai Lama. #14

6. He has won the Nobel Peace Prize. Maybe he saw Yoggie when he went to Sweden to get it.

6. He just got the Congressional Medal of Honor. This ticked off the Chinese. That's O.K. I don't like Chinese food. But then, I'm not too sure what Congress is either.

7. He travels all over the world. Maybe this makes him not miss is bed in Tibet so much. Gotta keep busy.

8. You must refer to him as "His Holiness" out of respect.

9. You can watch is webcasts!

10. He has three commitments (according to his website). First to realize that humans are the same and that we should ease suffering. I think he'd apply this to all creatures.

11. Second, to promote religious harmony. That's a good thing. I've been learning about world religions lately, so I am qualified to give an opinion.

12. Third to free Tibet so he can be reincarnated there. Yep, there's no place like home.

13. And best of all, he's a USC Fan. Fight On!

I am a displaced kitty

2007-10-12T12:25:00.000-07:00

I'm back online! Yeh-haw, as my cowboy friends would say.

My silly mama has been so busy since two Sundays ago.
Here's what she's been doing. I'm sure you will all agree that she needs to quit lolly-gagging around get her priorities straight. She is my employee and she has been slacking off! I do not tolerate slackers, as you know. I am very industrious. (see my cardboard box). Not that I haven't been having a blast in the meantime, but no time for blogging with her thumbs to help me.

Monday through Tuesday she can't really account for. She was probably nipped-out.

Thursday she went to the quilt shop really far away for a whole day with her mama and her auntie. They bought lots of fabrics which I will get sit on very soon! She did see my cousins Rudy and Ellen.

Then she had a visitor from Friday to Wednesday. Now, it's true that I really like this special visitor because he throws me up in the air and calls me Peachy-poo and we can have man-to-man talks about very important things. Simone loves him even more because she's his special girl. Scout is glad he's gone and life is back to normal. But, naturally, Mama likes him best of all.
They did lots of stuff and went places I don't care to go. I'm too cool for that. But the real bummer was when they were fixing the car with grandpa. Oh, woe is me. I was locked out of the garage and I could hear all of the interesting noises and wanted to know so bad what was happening. I still don't see why I wasn't allowed to help. Clearly I am certified supervisor for all human activities.

Then yesterday she was applying for some complicated jobbie thing and needed the computer real bad.

But now I'm back and ready to catch up with you all! We'll post some new pictures when Mama gets her act together. I think I might have to fire her for negligence. But I haven't figured out how I would ever blog then.

Heroes

2007-09-30T12:24:00.000-07:00

Mama said to me that she's gonna put me on the 3:10 to Yuma. That's no problem. I've been there twice before. And escaped.

Just like my new Hero, Ben Wade.
We have a lot in common, don't you think?

I'm a dog-attacking MACHINE!

2007-09-28T16:02:00.000-07:00

Yo! I attacked my second dog this week. This was a biggie--golden retriever. Boy did I pull ol' fake-out on him. He just thought I was a silly kitty walking along and boom! Charge! Thwack! One shocked puppy on his way.

I'm the coolest.

p.s. Mama joined Facebook, so she's being a computer hog again! I have a Catbook page now though. Big Whoop. Blogs are cooler.

Oh When the SAINTS.....

2007-09-24T11:05:00.000-07:00

Check it out! My Team plays today! Rah! Rah! They better win this time....

NEWS FLASH:: I attacked a dog today!! Stupid Mama just stood there laughing her head off--holding her cell phone, so she could have documented my triumphant moment, but she didn't. She's so dumb sometimes.

He also let a baby pet him. What a fool. --Scout.

Pity Party for Peach

2007-09-22T10:33:00.000-07:00

Season's First Rain Knocks Out Power, Slows TrafficPOSTED: 6:19 am PDT September 22, 2007 LOS ANGELES -- The first rain of the season always brings more accidents, but not as many during the rainstorm that hit Friday as there might have been, police said Saturday.

SEE THAT HEADLINE KITTY KATS??? It's raining today! What the fuzz? The sun always shines in California! That's what I heard anyway before I agreed to move here. They lied to me. Lied. Lied. Lied. Lied. YOU know what this means?? I can't go outside! What I am supposed to do? Whine Whine Whine.

Mama: Don't worry Peach, we are throwing you a Pity Party.

Scout: Peach it's game day! You know that means you gotta put on your game face. We get to stay in and sit on quilts and watch football and sew and watch Band of Brothers. And I have a new USC blankie to sit on for game time (~~picture coming later, it's not game time yet, so I haven't sat on it~~ ). It s still not game time, but I was READY and I can do whatever I want today. The day couldn't be any better than this!! I'm having a great day! Enjoy your pity party, dude.

Oh, man. It's gonna be a looonngg day.....

Ahoy Mateys!

2007-09-19T17:59:00.001-07:00

Cap'n One-Eyed Simone Here for Meow Like a Pirate Day! First Mate Scurvy Peach is busy swabbing the decks, so there's no pirate-y picture of him.* I ordered 'im to walk the plank, arr. But he parlayed and I had to let him go. ARRGGH! Scout is a land lubber and won't participate.
Instead, I'll post a picture of our Favorite Pirates. Can you guess which one I'm in love with? Here's a hint, He likes to say "Savvy?" and he swaggers like me.
Meow like a pirate all day long me hearties!
Look what we found from Dragonheart--ours Pirate Names!

My pirate name is:

Iron Anne Kidd

A pirate's life isn't easy; it takes a tough person. That's okay with you, though, since you a tough person. Even though you're not always the traditional swaggering gallant, your steadiness and planning make you a fine, reliable pirate. Arr!

Get your own pirate name from piratequiz.com.
part of the fidius.org network

And Peach:

My pirate name is:

Mad Jack Kidd

Every pirate is a little bit crazy. You, though, are more than just a little bit. Even though you're not always the traditional swaggering gallant, your steadiness and planning make you a fine, reliable pirate. Arr!

Get your own pirate name from piratequiz.com.
part of the fidius.org network

*Cap'n Mama has no clue how to use photoshop, maybe she should walk the plank, arr!!

Mancat Monday: It's all about Me

2007-09-17T14:42:00.000-07:00

Maggy and Zoey at Zoolatry made the wonderful pictures of me. I just love to look at pictures of myself, so I'm dedicating today's Mancat Monday to myself. I don't need any advice and apparently no kitties need advice at the moment so, all the more time to look at adoring pictures of Peach Man.

"Boxes of Peaches"

"Peachy Keen"

"The Peach Pit"

Simone and Scout on FRENEMIES

2007-09-16T13:32:00.001-07:00

Scout: Did you notice that picture that Peach posted on Friday? He was sitting in MY chair! Every picture ever posted of me, I'm sitting in that CHAIR with MY BLUE TOWEL.

Simone: Tell me about it. Now you've taken MY spot and I'm forced to stay awake because you snore like an oncoming train. Besides, he'll be along in a few minutes to terrorize us.

Scout: You know what Peach is, he's a FRENEMY. And I'm a Valley Cat, so I should know how to use my slang.

S&S (scowling): Oh, and we're supposed to shameless promote HIS poll and HIS mancat monday column. Just a reminder to participate. Or not. If you'd like to him fail miserably.

How I got my name Meme

2007-09-15T19:23:00.000-07:00

I am so behind on memes (catnip meme from Sam and Tig, 7 Ps from JJ, and who knows what else) that I thought I'd jump right in here and let you all know how I got my name. This sounded fun and maybe I'll catch up on the others if my paws don't wear out first.

I got my name cuz I'm a PEACH! Mama adopted me from the Tompkins County SPCA and because I was the cutest cat there. That's my version. According her mama, it was because I "reached out and touched someone" (her). I just stretched out my long leg and said, "hey what about me? what do you think lady? am I the cutest bestest manliest one here?" (I still had my h00-haahs). I found my way to the SPCA in a hot pink collar.I was also sooo skinny. 6 lbs. I should weigh 13 for my structure, but I can't get above 11 cuz I'm such a busy guy. I had a bad case of worms that took Mama 2 months to clear up, along with one wrong diagnosis of asthma. I had to take super-turbo-mega dewormer. Not fun. Lemme tell you. Also lost my hoo-hahs. Mama claims I had a high voice before I lost them, but she's wrong. I only became LV (little voice) after that fateful day.
Mama went through lots of potential names, but Peach stuck. She said, he won't be Peaches because everycat is Peaches, just Peach, in the singular. And then one day my Auntie Anne (Jimmy Joe's Mama) decided to sing "I am the Peach Man, koo koo ka choo" to me. Then I was Peach Man. Sometimes, I'm just "the Man", and usually referred to as THE Peach Man, not just plain old Peach Man. I'm also called "Prince" "Peachness", "Peachnik", "Peacher" and "Sir Peachley" and lots of other mean names by the girls that aren't fit for print. On all of my medical records, I'm known as "Peach, DMH"

Ok that was long, I don't have the energy for more memes. I gotta sleep. Been bird hunting all day, man.

Peach Cannot Live By Jello Shots Alone

2007-09-13T14:09:00.001-07:00

The late summer and autumn of my discontent is getting better. See this picture of me last week. Remember how B-O-R-E-D I was? I want you to note very carefully how many toys I have. Mama counted 8 toys, plus my box and the attack post (what most of you call, "scratching" post). This is about 1/5 of the toys I actually have. Do you UNDERSTAND now why I have been going out of my mind with nothing to do??

I have hardly had any time to blog since last week because the weather finally changed a little. Also Mama is looking for a J-O-B so she is being such a computer hog. I know what a job is, duh. I have some very important jobs. See me staking out for a day of business. I have v. imp. things to do.
Like make inspections!!! Who knows why this cone is here, but holes in the ground are very tempting. I think I want to take this cone home with me.
I am also a budding Naturalist. I have caught 1 bird per day, that makes 4 fine specimens. I started to collect them in the back yard for my forthcoming museum exhibit, but this morning they were mysteriously gone! Where did they go? No one will answer me. I will have start using state-of-art security measures to protect my specimens. Mama said she wouldn't take pictures. Actually, it was something like "dammit Peach not again!!", and lots of "eeeeww gross" and maybe some "why would I photograph rotting flesh and maggots?" What maggots? Those were quality birds, man. They just needed a few more days to mummify.

In the afternoons, I have some SERIOUS partying to do. But if I tell you who I party with and where I party, I'd have to kill you. It's down the street in the special yard. Mama isn't allowed to take pictures either. It's a secret society. My spotty lips are sealed.

Drunk on jello shots and with too much nip in my system, I have to come home eventually. Then I do things like sleep, try to chew on Ipods, pick on the girls. Nothing wears me down I tell you.

Party on, party kitties!

p.s. I was too busy partying, ahem, working, to do mancat monday. I'll try to be better next week.

P.P.S Check out My POLL

Look! Mr. Hendrix Thinks I'm Nice!

2007-09-07T10:30:00.001-07:00

Wow! Hey Mama, Mr. Hendrix thinks I'm NICE! Mr. Hendrix nominated ME for this award because he thinks I perform such a good service to everykitty with my advice column. No more saying to me , "Hey Peach, you're such a Jerk!! I think they made a movie about you." Nope. Not anymore Mama. I'm certified NICE.

Look how pretty it is! I know, sometimes I like girly things. Haven't you seen me dress up? Pink is really not my "color" (it clashes with orange. too bad) but I still love this award.

I want to nominate my sisters for this award because actually they are the nice cats around here. But since we share a blog, it's already posted. Simone is just the nicest with the kiddies as you've seen. Besides, Scout would like to wear her Tuxedo to the award ceremony.

Now for other cat bloggers:

I nominate my buddy Jimmy Joe because, as Mama says, he is the "Great Melon of World Peace" and brings harmony to everyone's lives. Really, he just likes the tummy rubs. But every kitty he meets likes him, so that really says somethings. He's not the hissy type, if you know what I mean.

Also Eric and Flynn because they are trying so hard to be nice to each other these days and have finally succeeded! That deserves a Nice Award!

Simone's Party Pictures

2007-09-04T10:02:00.000-07:00

Simone's Party:

I'm dressed up and I wants to know when the party starts...those old ladies sure are slow!

I'll just work on my box in the meantime. There's always time for ART!

OK, Party People! Let's get this PARTY STARTED!!!!

Why is the Birthday Girl hiding under the car?

A reluctant birthday girl posing (this ribbon is SO STUPID)

Yay! Finally ICE CREAM! (hang on I see Peach out of the corner of my eye)

Mama here: Peach ruined the Party. He attacked Simone and then no one wanted to eat their ice cream. Scout got her fair share later (see below)
Hey!! That's NOT true. I just wanted to see if she had a better flavor than me. Simone is so touchy.

Scout feels very voluptuous in her Ribbon. Scout partied too hard. She's hung-over.

Mancat Monday: Dear Peach Man #5 AND Simone's Thank You

2007-09-03T10:23:00.000-07:00

Dear Peach Man,
I need your help as a life coach. How can I get my humans to stop picking me up for cuddles? I hate cuddles but I don't want to hurt their feelings.
FAZ

Dear FAZ,
How much do you hate these cuddles? To what extremes are you willing to go make them stop? The first though that came to me was to do the obvious and use your claws and teeths. I'm guessing though, you done this already. And it is just a bit meaner than you are aiming for. So, maybe you need to "kick it up a notch". I think you should try passing gas whenever they cuddle you. Really foul, silent but deadly ones. That way you are smelly, but not smelly all the time like you-know-who AND it appears to be accidental so no hurt feelings. You have to train your humans to associate negative things with cuddles. Or, you could always train yourself to like cuddles. I've been working on this myself over the years. I started by sitting next to my mama and then letting her hold me for 2 seconds and then a little longer and a little longer and pretty soon, I sorta liked it. But still, being held isn't my favorite either, I got better things to do!

Peach Man

Hi Nephew Peach,
this is your Aunt Ellen from California asking some advice on stuffed nostrills withou going to the VET!!! Your senile, arthritic old aunt.
Love ya Nephew Peach Aunt Ellen

Dear Aunt Ellen, I think you should spend extra time in the new bathroom. That way you get the steamy benefits of showers (clear out those sinuses) AND you can sneeze all over the new bathroom and make it yours. That's what I'd do. Showertime, Auntie Ellen!
Peach Man

Simone Here: I know it is Mancat Monday and believe me I wanna stay away from all that Peachy Nonsense, but I do want to thank everyone for their birthday wishes and Nice Presents. It was such a great birthday thanks to you all. I will post pictures on Tuesday, since Scout will let me share Tuxie Tuesday, I'm sure.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY SIMONE!!!

2007-09-01T09:09:00.000-07:00

Simone's birthday is Today (ok, Saturday, but I'm posting now to give lots of time for Birthday wishes)!! Here's 16 things about her (with help from Mama):

1.Simone was born in 1992. That means she never had to be a communist kitty. But almost.
2. Her dearest wish for her birthday is that I be left outside to suffer heatstroke. Alternately, tied up downstairs or locked in the bathroom.
3. Simone's first owner died and that's how she came to Mama.
4. Simone used to have two beautiful eyes, but got a corneal ulcer. Now she has ONE beautiful eye.
5. Her nickname is "The One-Eyed Wonder"
6. Simone used to have a brother named Gunther, but he died shortly after they came to the SPCA. Gunther looked just like me.
7. Simone loves to ride in the car.
8. Simone loves to give headbutts and slimes. So much that Mama gets annoyed with her.
9.She has discovered the joys and benefits of daily yoga in her old age.
10.Her favorite treat is Chicken.
11.But her favorite flavor of cat food is Beef.
12.Simone licks beans to tell them she loves them. This is kind of gross.
13.Simone loves to take in the morning sunshine. I think everyone knew this already.
14.She never liked to be brushed until just a few months ago.
15.Simone has a very scratchy and tiny voice. You can hardly hear her sometimes. But she can sure purr!
16. Simone likes to live her life to the fullest! And this means meeting new people, going new places, and trying new things. She's a brave kitty.

Even though I pick on her, I'm still glad she's around! Happy Birthday Old Lady!
From Peach (And Scout and Mama)

P.S. Simone still has a cold. That suks to have a cold for your birthday, so she needs extra luv.

We light some candles to Remember

2007-08-31T16:08:00.000-07:00


For our dear friend Oscar and in memory of Simone's Brother Gunther, who would be 16 today if he had made it.

p.s. also a friend's woofie died, which is very sad too. He was old and his time had come.

To My Dear BUD

2007-08-30T14:52:00.000-07:00

I am going to miss my wildandcrazyguy. We had just got plans for our new club. Well, I will take up the plans in his memory and name the club after him. All cats who like to be daredevils can do stuff in his memory. We're sending purrs to his family and are so shocked by his sudden death!!!

Thursday Thirteen: Double Version

2007-08-30T13:29:00.001-07:00

BY SIMONE

We haven't been blogging and here's Thirteen Reasons Why :

1. Peach hid under the bed from Wednesday until Tuesday. Wednesday and Thursday in anticipation of the visitors and Friday to Tuesday in fear of them. We have no photos of this because he's a chicken.

2. Mancat Monday was destroyed because the family went to Irvine. Besides which, Peach was still hiding under the bed and sweating through his paws.

3. I kept myself busy by making a new friend, Max. He's six. He'll be starting the first grade on Tuesday.

4. I made another friend, Annie, Max's mom and my Mama's cousin.

5. I made another friend, Cameron, Max's brother. Cameron is a big Fifth Grader. Wow!

6. I hung out with the boys and they made Pizza for Everybuddy. Naturally, my hair was the secret ingredient. Yummo!
7. Scout was busy making faces, but trying to stay curious.
8. Scout has been so limbered up by her new glucosamine supplements that she has no time for blogging, only jumping on walls and climbing trees.
9. Then everyone left and we had to spend a day recovering. It's so tiring having company. But Peach really missed out. Those boys were so much fun!

10. Peach has been sleeping with his paw all funny. Who knows, maybe he broke his foot! Wouldn't that be cool! (Oh, Mama says he's just weird, his foot is fine).
11. Peach keeps insisting that he has to go outside and spends time whining when he could be blogging.

12. I've been feeling under the weather. I have a cold. I shouldn't be using the computer because I sneeze all over it.

13. It's been 108 in the shade and that's too hot to do anything!!

BY PEACH

Thirteen Reasons Why I Should Be Allowed to Go Outside

1. If we lived in Phoenix, 108 would be cool.
2. I have things to do. I gotta see a cat about a man.
3. Because I said so. WAAAAHH!
4. 108 is not SO hot.
5.I have played with every toy I own. At least twice.
6. My art work is progressing faster than usual
7. AAAHHH! I'm going crazy inside!!!!
8.I'll just attack Simone if you don't let me
9.It's ONLY 108.
10. I can attack Scout too.
11.Inside is so boring.
12. 108 is nice weather on other planets.
13. Because I said so. So there.

Mancat Monday: Dear Peach Man #4

2007-08-20T11:52:00.000-07:00

We have lots of summer themed questions this week ranging from vaccinations to lizards (they like the warm weather) to vacationing beans, so tune in pussy cats.... (Like my summer "action shot"??)

My Mommie says it is WRONG to eat lizards, and she takes them away from me. I say if I catch them, I should get to eat them all up. What do you think?

From,

Daisy

Dear Daisy,
It is my opinion that ALL lizards that you catch are yours to eat. I have had similar experiences. I catch things and the No Lady or her conspirators take them away. What's a guy to do? I understand your situation. I think you must overcome your instink to show off your fine hunting skills to your Mommie and devour all lizards in private. Just let her take away the occasional lizard to fake her out.

Happy Hunting!
Peach Man

Peachman,

It's yoor gerls purrthday, it's da last minit, what do yoo get her?

Speedy

Dear Speedy,

I am sorry for answering your question so late. Forces interfered with my ability to blog. I am sure your gerlfriend's purrthday is past. Still, I think you should make her an e-card or send her a special online prezzent. Or even better you could send her a special gift from Petsmart, like a toy or a costume or some high quality nip. Nothing like a fine baggie of nip to make her love you.

Good luck in love, Speedy Man,
Peach Man

Peach Man,

I have a question for you for next week.

I am finally a Mancat, but I find myself doing kittenish things.

As a kitten, I never used to "knead" my humans (some people call this making biscuits). A few months ago, however, I was left alone overnight while my humans were at a race. I was so happy to see my mom when she came home that when I was on her lap and being pet, I started kneading! My human mom was delighted, and I was surprised.

After that, I started kneading my mom occasinally, say once every two weeks or so. Recently, however, the frequency has increased, and I am kneading her every other day.

Should I be concerned? It is my understanding that this is kittenish behaviour. However, I am now a Mancat, so is this appropriate?

Thanks.

Dragonheart

Dear Dragonheart,

I am sure many cats suffer from the same problem. I find myself kneading on occasion and sometimes I even drool. Yes, it is not very "manly" of me, but sometimes being a mancat means showing your softer side. Plus, the girls really dig it. As long as you remember to keep your claws in as much as possible your Mama shouldn't have too much of a problem. Also try not to do it when she is wearing her good clothes or she might get mad and yell at you. It is a very normal cat behavior that can last your whole life. It really just means you have transfered the love you had for your kittymama to your human mama. So, Dragonheart, knead away and really let yourself go!

Purrs to you, new Mancat,
Peach Man

Dear Peach Man: Hee! Hee! Saw you run up the ole' tree this morning. You came right down--remembered what happened the last time you went up that tree, didn't you?!!!!

Anyway, I gots a problem. The vet has sent 2 notices that I need to come in for a rabies vaccination. I know the beans are going to take me in and I'm shakin' in my white spats. Help! What do I do? How do I get out of this?

Scout

Dear Scout,

I'm sorry that you already went to the vet and I didn't help you get out of it. But, honestly, unlike other cats, I LIKE to go to the vet. It's so fun. You get meet all sorts of dogs and other cats, sometimes birds too. And the ladies are nice and the doctors too. They tell you how beautiful you are and pet you and stuff. Plus, I heard you got a treat for being such a good kitty. I never got a treat from a doctor! It's so easy when all you need is a shot. It's very important to have the rabies vaccine because there are bats that might bite you and give you rabies and then you'd give it me. So good thing you went.
As a public heath service announcement, I officially recommend that all kitties GET THEIR VACCINES AND CHECKUPS!! It's for your own good, no matter how awful the car ride is and how stinky like a dog the office is.

Peach Man

My beans are taking a whole week off work BUT they will be leaving me for FOUR WHOLE DAYS. Now, I will have my grandbeans taking care of me so I will get spoiled (new toys, extra treats) but the point is, my beans should NOT take off work to go away. The only time they should take off work is to spend time with me.
I have been snarkey in the past when they get home and of course act all pathetic to the grandbeans so they report my "lonliness" to my beans, but how do I assure that this time will be the LAST time they abandon me.
I have an evil alter ego to help me if that gives you any ideas....
Really cheezed off ManCat.

PS they will be returning Tuesday the 21st so a Monday response would be perfect timing.

AND a similar question from Chase

I would like to ask...What is the appropriate way to treat a returning human? I'm unclear on time frames for being mad, purring, etc.

Chase

Dear Really Cheezed off Mancat and Chase,

Being a Peach Man, I have no time frame. I just throw myself shamelessly at my returning Mama. I just can't bring myself to be mad at her for leaving. Mostly because by the time I see her, I forgot that she left. I wish I had a longer memory. Simone is good at the ignoring/mad part. She says no more than a few hours of this is required. Otherwise, you will just be considered a snobby cat and no one will love you. Purring should resume as soon as returning humans settle down on the couch and/or bedtime at the latest, depending on when they get back. And most important of all I don't leave my Mama's side for a good long while to make sure she doesn't leave me again. This is what I think "Cheezed off" should do. He should be ever vigilant.
Other possibilities for Cheezed off: getting deathly ill helps prevent beans from leaving. Another option is to cause some sort of trouble that requires your family to come home early. That way, they won't want to risk it again. Evil alter-egos are helpful for the implementation of this tactic. If you want to go there, terrible destructive behavior. Preferably self-destructive. If you destroy the house, they are liable to get rid of you, but if you inflict wounds to yourself they will feel sorry for you and not leave you unattended again. I know this tough, but it depends how desperate you are. Scratching yourself til you bleed isn't always easy.
Good luck to Cheezed off and Chase,
Peach Man

Until Next Week, my friends....
Yours Truly, Peach Man

What a Week! My Mama Came Back to Me

2007-08-14T19:47:00.000-07:00

I am sincerely repentant for the absence of my Mancat Monday Dear Peach Man Advice Column! There was a Sleepy Sunday followed by a Manic Mancat Monday and I just didn't get to post. My mama was so busy visiting with Jimmy Joe's Mama on Sunday and Monday that she forgot to do my post. Plus the innernet wasn't working too good and the "system administrator,"aka Jofish, couldn't fix it cuz Mama's computer is dumber than a dog. Then the rest of the week I was too busy hanging out with my Mama making sure she didn't leave me again.

EVERYCAT, THE BIG NEWS IS:

My Dear Mama is finally home, back with me. Finally!!!! (Ahem, as if, I mean, I didn't even notice she was gone.)
She was travelin' through these places:
She left good old Ithaca, where I was born,
Then went to Philadelphia
with lotsa shoppin' in the airport.
Then on to Las Vegas
(good thing she didn't gamble away my cat food money)

And finally to Burbank
Then home to ME!!! Whoooppee! (I mean, yeah, whatever, I'm a tuff guy, I don't need my mama!)(ok, so that's an old halloween picture, it's the best I could find.)
Now I can relax and go outside, since it's only 99 degrees, and work on my art. I've been feeling so inspired since she's been home. Look!!!

My advice column will return on Monday and I will catch up with you guys over the weekend!

Mancat Monday: Dear Peach Man #3

2007-08-06T18:50:00.000-07:00

Dear Peach Man: I've been sidelined recently with a hip fracture and my beans won't let me play or do anything. Life is BORING!!!!!!!! Do you have any ideas how I could have some fun? I sure would like to meet you some day. You are my hero! Jack

Dear Jack, You poor kitty. How did you fracture your hip? You must be one wildandcrazyguy. I have a number of suggestions. First, the innernet is your friend. You should blog, check out others' blogs, and maybe even take the IDYA challenge to make NOMSS friend. You never know who you might meet--and all from the comfort of your confinement zone. This also reduces the risk of eating, or getting eaten by, your new Not of My Species Special Friend. Then, you should spend a lot of time plotting how to get everyone back for keeping you out of the game for so long. See my previous suggestion to "Anonymous" about creating a war room. When you are well, you will have lots of destructive, ahem, I mean creative, energy to release, so you'd better have a plan. Finally, in your spare time, there is always kitty TV. Not CAT tv, which on the google turns up lots of links to local access television which is just plain BORING. Who wants to watch 10th graders do their math homework or city council meetings, huh? Nokitty I know. Instead, check out nature programs, or get this DVD from Australia called Catsize Entertainment Check out this kitty having fun at home, surely you could do this. Finally, you might like to start taking yoga classes, as you recuperate. Skittles offers them regularly.

Good luck, and good night, my friend. Peach Man

Dear Peach Man:

My boyfuriend doesn't write me or send my messages or talk to me very much! Should I find a new boyfuriend? What should I do?

So sad!!

Anonymous

Dear Anonymous, I think you find out why your boyfuriend is not paying enough attention to you. If he is a busy mancat, he probably is too busy thinking about what havoc to wreak next, so really, he doesn't have much space in his pea-brain for mushy-gushy lovey stuff. Maybe he's just no good at it. Do you send him messages and write to him? You should a good nose sniffing session together and figure out what is going on. Worst case scenario, ask yourself, What Would Oprah Do? And go read this book:

I am sorry for your heartache and I hope your love life improves!
Purrs,
Peach Man

Dear loyal readers,
That's all for this week!! Keep sending in those questions....and have no fear, Peach Man is here!

Tuxie Tuesday: For Samantha

2007-07-31T09:08:00.000-07:00

Happy Birthday Glitter Graphics

Mancat Monday: Is anyone out there?

2007-07-30T20:09:00.000-07:00

Dear Peach Man,
Is anyone out there? I love to watch your endeavors crash and burn.
Love,
Scout

Dear Scout,
Thanks. Actually you are the only one who submitted a question this week. However a quick google of "advice for cats" turned up some funny links my loyal readers may like to peruse.

1.

Useful Advice for Cats: How To Care For Your Human

Expat Focus > > Forums > > Europe > > Hungary > > Safety advice ...

Safety advice for cats in rural Hungary

3.

feline advisory bureau charity uk animal advice for cats and kittenscats and kittens rescue charity cat protection league animal shelters rehoming moggies and other cat and kitten breeds in the uk.

um, eric or flynn, or anybuddy else, what is a MOGGIE???? Oh, wait. Jofish sez it is a "britishism" for CAT. There we go. I don't have to ask questions on my own advice column, no I don't. And google confirms it is a term for stray or cats of undefined breed.

Many happy returns, as the "British" say.

P-Man

Simone on Sunday: At Home Spa Day

2007-07-29T10:58:00.001-07:00

How to Create Your Very Own At Home Spa:

You will Need
1 Servant (minimum, 2 is even better!)
1 brush
1 packet of catnip, fresh catnip, or the lawn
2 chamomile kitty wipes
nail clipper
fresh water or skanky water from the yard (whichever you prefer)
lunchmeat of choice
a good book or two

Start the day off with lots of fresh water to cleanse your body and let the detox begin. Eat breakfast as usual. Instruct the servant to clip nails first and get the worst of it over. If possible go outside now and take in some sunshine, run through the sprinklers, up a tree (if you can). Get lots of scritches and lovin' in the sunshine. This can also be done indoors by the window. Now have some more water and a little nip, fresh nip, or grass. Let yourself be brushed until you are almost gorgeous. If you are elderly and long haired like me, it could take a while. Next, wipe down with the chamomile kitty wipe. This is good for dandruff, stress relief and general dirtiness. Brush some more. Have some yard water. Have some lunch meat.

When this ritual is finished, let the servant have some time off. Hang out in the yard with her and let her read her book while you hunt bugs and enjoy the fine summer Sunday

Enjoy the day everykitty!

p.s. Peach wants to shamelessly promote is advice column. Don't forget to send him Questions!!!

Tuxie Tuesday

2007-07-24T10:17:00.001-07:00

This is as close as I get to an "action shot". I just might turn over. After I sleep some more.

Scout

Mancat Monday: Dear Peach Man #1

2007-07-23T10:20:00.000-07:00

HEY EVERYBUDDY, SORRY FOR THE DELAY IN MY POST. GOT UP THIS MORNING THE SO-CALLED 'ROUTER' WAS 'BROKEN'. YEAH. WHATEVER. THEY JUST WANT TO STOP ME FROM A SUCCESSFUL CAREER AS A ADVICE COLUMNIST.

Dear Peach Man -

I run and I run, and I play and I play, and I jump jump jump...and STILL I gits a poochie belly! How comes I do all this exercise and still gits a poochie belly?!
Yer bud,
Sabi

Dear Sabi,

Well, unfortunately, you must suffer from an odious and malingering disease (practicing my vocab here). My only suggestion to you is to go outside, eat nasty stuff, get worms or a Fever Of Unknown Origin. That will get you skinny in no time. Diets just don’t work (I asked Scout—see, I don’t personally suffer from poochie belliness). However, from personal experience with worms (before I was adopted) and FUO (last summer), I can tell you that brings about rapid weight loss like no other. Your beans might object though. See, they call me the “million dollar kitty” now.

Peach Man

Dear Peachman,

I have a problem. I wish to go outside strollering or on my harness and leash EVERY day. But my Mommie only takes me out sometimes. What am I to do?

Thank you,

Daisy!

Dear Daisy,

You may recall an earlier post of mine on a similar subject. Essentially, you either hire another servant solely for strollering (any neighbor kids need a summer job?) or become the most annoying kitty on the planet. Whine until you think you can’t anymore, and then whine some more! Also, it is helpful to remind her that kitties NEED, and I mean, NEED, fresh air daily. Unless it is raining, but we won’t go into the exceptions. Therefore, she is subjecting you to cruel and unusual punishment every day that she doesn’t take you out. Remind her of this. Call Amnesty International. Start a Petition. Good luck getting out more!

Peach Man

Dear Peach Man

I have a very serious and important question.

How can I get rid of my baby brother?

It all started nine months ago. There I was, a single and happy siamese
prince, doted on by two stupid humans when suddenly, out of nowehere, came
this tiny white ball of poo smelling fur. I was disgusted! Honestly, he came
into my home, took over my territory, ate all of my food and used my litter
tray as though it were his. The humans love him - they adore him! To make
matters much worse, he now has his own blog and has made lots and lots of
cat blogging friends -the traitors. I just need to know how I can put
things right in the world - where everything is mine and the whole world
revolves around me alone. I have been living with the white stinker for a
year now and my nose just can't take any more! He really stinks!

Yours, in despair

Anonymous

Dear Anonymous,

Scout has some experience with this. As do I. We both suggest terror. I know all good cats should not act like Robespierre, the IRA, the Shining Path and Osama bin Ladin combined, but sometimes a cat’s gotta do what a cat’s gotta do. In the process, you may acquire some invidious nicknames, but consider this a plus. Your mission is being accomplished. Now, I suggest much chasing, hissing, sneaking up on while eating. Also, it is good to initiate play at the time of day when said invader is most likely NOT to play. Insist upon it. In particular, Scout recommends chasing said invader when he wants to go the box. Make the basic functions of life like eating, sleeping, pooping, and snuggling extremely difficult. Be relentless and systematic. You could even set up a War Room (See photo) if you wanted to keep track. Turn the invaders friends against him. Isolate and destroy. You might also watch Mean Girls for some tips.

Windex should help with the stinkiness. Spray liberally as needed.

May the Force Be With You.

Peach Man

Calling all cats in Distress!

2007-07-21T09:40:00.000-07:00

Do you have a problem?
Do you suffer from General Mental Confusion, Nervous Habits, Heartaches?
Are you unsure about whether to wear to wear pink or blue this summer? White shoes after Labor Day?
Do you get dizzy when you watch too many hummingbirds?
Do kittens make you nervous?
Do you eat too much? Too little? Have you ever been accused of being a PICKY EATER, and want to know how to respond?
Bad Habits? Weird Habits?
Gerl Questions?

As we all know, it's Hard Out There for A CAT.

Have NO FEAR, THE PEACH MAN is HERE!! (and my staff...)

Submit all of your burning questions to DEAR PEACH MAN. My new advice column, which will run as part of Mancat Monday (unless something more interesting, strange, or miraculous happens--like I fall in the lake, Simone loses another eye, or Scout has kittens). Just click on the link in the sidebar or email directly to peachmansblog@gmail.com

(MY couch is more comfy!!!)

Wordless Wednesday

2007-07-18T10:39:00.000-07:00

Mancat Monday, or Advice Column

2007-07-16T11:56:00.000-07:00

Since one of the mane duties of a Mancat is to dispense advice, I thought I'd give a little photo journal of advice for Parker's upcoming journey to O hi O (seeing as I just had experience with this myself). Mostly, though, it's advice for Rudy, and any other adventurous cats out there.

How to handle the worst day ever (spent in a PTU in a car)
When your day starts off like this:

Oh, no, NOT another day in the car! Don't wake me up. Just leave me here to die.

Try to look as distressed as possible when you are allowed fresh air. Pathetic whines, sweaty paws, hyperventilate if possible. Ignore all attempts to comfort and soothe.

My other favorite tactic, as you know, is to hide in the bedframe. (Admittedly, Jofish was terrible and documented the whole experience.)
Hide in there, and even when they shake the bed so hard you think you are going to die....

HOLD ON!!!!!!!!!!!! And don't say a word. Make sure you try to get out the way you don't fit.

And eventually you will succeed in delaying the trip, pissing everyone off, but also giving a good laugh.

That's my Mancat Advice or Peach's Lonely Hearts Column for Today. Please submit burning questions for next week.....

MEME about ME, ME

2007-07-13T14:08:00.000-07:00

I'm finally back online. Mama up and left (on an airplane, don't know when she'll be back again...) And she took the computer with her. So I have to use Grandma's and that's not easy, specially since she can barely use it herself. But I have my vays.

I know all you cats must know the BIG news already. I have me a girlfriend (see her pretty picture). Yep, we met at the July Birthday Party. Then I went AWOL for a few days, as I said. Not my fault. Or maybe I'm just a typical guy. Meet a girl and don't call her back until she's good and nervous.

Here's my MEME from Jimmy Joe, Samantha and Parker!! Gee, a cat goes offline for a few days and suddenly he's Mr. Popular.

What were you doing 10 years ago?

I wasn’t born yet.

What were you doing a year ago?

I beamed myself across the country and waited for Mama to bring me something cool from Poland. And I harassed the squirrel on a regular basis.

5 Snacks I enjoy

Fresh French Bread (the white part), Ham, Turkey, Simone’s Vitamins, Salami(but nobuddy lets me that because, well, I don’t clean my own litter box).

5 songs to which I know all the lyrics

Only 5? I love songs!!

I am the Walrus (except I sing, “I am the Peach Man, Koo Koo Ka Choo”)

Bad to the Bone

Come Together

I’m Free (Rolling Stones)

Peaches (Presidents of the United States)

5 things you would do if you were a millionaire

Buy a farm to live on

Invest in a lizard and mouse breeding program for that farm.

Develop a Squirrel Repellent.

Make a diet pill for kitties who have a hard time losing weight (like Scouty)

Hire a team of servants (3 just aren’t enough to meet my needs)

5 bad habits

I beat up Simone

I beat up Scout

I eat yarn and string, pins, anything lying around.

I steal any treats or food that are not under lock down.

I get my paws stuck in the sewing machine.

5 things I enjoy doing

Going outside (I gotta be FREE, man!)

Sleeping in strange places (like on table legs, books, behind the computer)

Beating up Simone and Scout (just cuz it’s bad, doesn’t mean I don’t love it!)

Eating junk food.

Just being ME

5 things I would never wear again

Nope, I’d pretty much wear anything, more than once.

5 favorite toys

Simone

Mama

Blue Mouse

Twist Tie

Straw

I tag ChaChing (we all want to know more about that expensive little dude), Speedy, Zippy, and Sadie, and Oscar the Puppy Cat

Kitties for Planet Earth

2007-07-08T12:57:00.000-07:00

Hello My Kool KATS,

Have you been following the live earth concerts? You can watch them online at http://liveearth.msn.com/ I wasn't in the mood for blogging yesterday, when the concert was in full swing, because of my embarrassing moment yesterday (of which I WILL NOT speak). Let's just say, it involved at tree, a very tall tree. And now I am truly a "tree-hugger". NO, That's all I have to say about that. It's too embarrassing and not at all manly. (To answer ArtsyCatsy's further inquiry into the tree incident)

Anyway, you should all check out the website because you can learn about things like your carbon pawprint and eco-pawprint (these are quizzes, whoohoo!), how your beans can be more green (like NOT drive their cars so much and grow more catnip in the yard, something we'd all like!), how to help our endangered animal friends, and cool things like that. And, you don't even have to read Al Gore's blog if you don't want. This whole thing is way more exciting than Al Gore (yeah, how many of you kitties had to sit through his movie??). There are bloggies from beans at the concerts too.

It's a great combo of my favorite things, MUSIC and Planet Earth.

I did my part today by going outside and fertilizing the roses. Pretty good--I'm just an "eco-apprentice", but I can get better. And my pledge gives me suggestions too!

Check it out guys!!

HAPPY 4TH!!

2007-07-04T10:44:00.001-07:00

HAPPY FOURTH OF JULY FROM ALL OF US!!!

Eating is the best part of the 4th of July
No, acting, Wild and Crazy is! I'm pretending to be a firework!

I can't hold this pose any longer...You are trying my patience.

And finally Fourth of July Feast (imagine, a picture with all of us being peaceful together!)

BE SAFE AND DON'T LET THE FIREWORKS SCARE YOU TOO MUCH!

PEACH, SCOUT, SIMONE

Are you a member of the Blogerati?

2007-07-02T17:57:00.001-07:00

I am! I am! I am a blogerati. (noun. The blogosphere (qv) intelligentsia, from samizdata.net OR Blogerati
1. The collective blogging intelligentsia, commonly understood as being the most influential and highly trafficked bloggers online by page rank and the effect of link traffic.
2. The most intellectually hefty subsection of this group. from whatis.com)

Jofish sez the real defintion is people who are obessessed their blogs and don't live their real lives. Blog snobs. He thinks instead, I'm member of the Peacherati. Oh, yeah, baby. I love myself. That's for sure. No one more important that the Peach Man.

Mama points out that the word is derived from Italian. But she doesn't know how to make singulars in that language. Blogerat? Sounds too Russian. Like Samizdat--that's what we are Cat Samizdat (self-publication to avoid the censors back in the USSR). If you can have intelligent (a member of the intelligentsia), then why can't I be a BLOGERAT? Huh? Huh?

OH, wait, you gots to be "influential" (check), "highly trafficked" (getting there, I'm no Skeezix yet), intellectually hefty (????).

Yep, I'm a Blogerat. Are you?

SCOUT: What is it with you and the USSR?? You're weird.
SIMONE: Like that's a surprise to anyone.

You say you want a REVOLUTION

2007-07-01T11:52:00.000-07:00

Cats of the world unite, you have nothing to lose but your collars. --Karl Manx

Come on Scout, it's time for the REVOLUTION!!

Scout: I'm sleeping.

But, it's time. We must take up the torch. Pick up where Lenin and Trotsky left off.

Scout: Shut up. You're bugging me.

KGB BAR, Bratislava (My hangout)

What kind of revolutionary are you? I have to be true to my Cossack roots.

Scout: Your what?

My Cossack-ness. I am Ukrainian you know.

Scout: That's why you are KGB.

That's right. Kotski Grupa Bezopasnosti (Cat Security Agency). We come for you in the night. When you are sleeping. When you are unawares. See the photo of our founder...a VERY bad man, who happened to be Polish. Not Ukrainian. And a bean, not a cat. You can't have everything.

Scout: How do you know all this stuff?

It's not my fault I'm forced to read all this history. Some beans just know too much. We were founded in....

Scout: I'm trying to sleep be quiet. I don't care about the history of your stupid KGB.

We learned many of our tactics from the Gestapo.

Scout: I always said you were a Nazi.

No, I am not a Nazi. I am KGB. There's a difference.

Scout: Well, I'm the CIA. I win. You lose. Now let me sleep.

Whiska Wednesday

2007-06-27T14:44:00.000-07:00

Check out my SPOTTY LIPS. Any of yoos got spotty lips too? (They had to torture me to get this pikture)

Our Horoscopes

2007-06-26T18:01:00.000-07:00

Peach (6/4/02):

Gemini: Cat On A Hot Tin Roof

Gemini is the Sign of the kitten-cat...the exaggeratedly playful feline who is fickle and indecisive to the point of distraction. Blessed with the gift of eternal youth, this cat will fritter away his or her life in a muddled confusion of comings and goings...ditherings and datherings...for this is the born explorer of the cat world. The Gemini Cat is a highly intellectual creature but lacks the ability to make much sense, twittering and squawking at owners most of the time. This feline is a lively and enthusiastic cat, but possesses something of a split personality, which only serves to further complicate an already complex character. It is not often that the feline species will obey a human command, but many Gemini Cats seem to be the exception. Being the most communicative Sign of the Zodiac, these felines appear to actually understand the human language and may even "meow" back as if in answer. Though adverse to being restrained for such basic tasks as baths and nail-clipping, the intelligent nature of the Gemini Cat will allow an owner to prevail...provided the nasty experience is supplemented with loving praise and a favored treat. Physically, the Gemini Cat will always stand out as the cat with two heads...an optical illusion which arises from the ceaselessly agile movements and restless gestures. A highly-strung, hyperactive soul, this feline will possess small features and brightly-eager eyes that are constantly on the move. The Gemini Cat is sleek and long-limbed, possessed with probably the most acute eyesight of its species. The actions of this feline will always be erratic. He or she advances in short, quick flits which stop as suddenly as they started. Then, this feline will be off at a tangent from his or her original direction. Problems often surface when this cat is expected to do something that he or she does not want to do...perhaps stay inside at night, for example. Under such circumstances, the Gemini Cat will respond by collapsing in a heap of nervous exhaustion, refusing to move and expecting to be waited on hand-and-paw until the restriction is lifted. Being exceptionally bright creatures, the Gemini Cat will soon learn how to open any cat-flap.

The Gemini Cat views the home as one glorious adventure playground created especially for his or her enjoyment. This feline will cavort endlessly, sliding down banisters and climbing up curtains, but hardly ever sits still long enough for a cuddle. It is hard to believe that just one cat could cover so much ground and create such widespread destruction in a 24-hour span as can the Gemini Cat...but he or she is only doing what comes naturally. In general, the Gemini Cat is a charmer...a true social success capable of winning over even the most fervent cat-hater. The fun-loving nature and bubbly personality of this feline makes for a thoroughly entertaining pet...provided the owner can cope with the chaos which is sure to follow in his or her wake and is prepared to provide plenty of emotional support. The ancient astrologers made Gemini the ruler of sparrows, so any owner should be prepared for this feline to drop the occasional dead offering at his or her feet.

The Gemini Cat really comes into his or her own when living with a Libra owner and the infectious happiness will be quite obvious. Though Libra is nowhere near as flippant as Gemini, these two signs will share a rather lively relationship. The second-best choice for an owner of the Gemini Cat would probably be an Aquarius native, provided water does not comes into play too often. This feline finds it easy to make friends with most animals, including dogs, and simply adores the companionship of other cats.

Scout (1/17/94):

Capricorn: The Cat Burglar

The Capricorn Cat is a serious and shy creature, rarely taking time out for fun. In addition, this feline is probably one of the most selfish Zodiac. A prudent soul from the start, the Capricorn Cat will work calmly and deliberately toward the achievement of his or her life's ambition. This feline will plod through life in a punctillious way, head turned to the skies, falling over his or her own paws. This cat is constantly working out ways to improve his or her lot, and devising schemes to eliminate the owner's shortcomings. The Capricorn Cat harbors a great desire to climb ever-higher up the ladder of social success but will never be the "life and soul of the party" type. Physically, the Capricorn Cat is difficult to recognize by appearance alone. Ugly knees are really the only obvious characteristic attributable to this feline. The fur is usually sleek and lank and the expression slightly despondent. Indeed, this feline is very much an ordinary sort of cat, unlikely to draw any laudible gasps of admiration as he or she waddles across the floor. Possessed of a strong maternal/paternal instinct, the Capricorn Cat will view all the world's inhabitants as his or her "children." This feline often enjoys doing things that are out of the ordinary, such as sleeping in the bathtub on hot days or drinking water directly from the faucet. The Capricorn Cat is frequently frightened by things that do not normally bother other cats...shadows on the wall, the dark or high places, for example. In fact, it is likely that this feline feels most secure when sleeping under the bed or tucked behind shoes in a closet.

The Capricorn Cat prefers city life to country living. This feline is ideally suited for the position of Chief Mouser at the Town Hall, where hours could be whiled away playing with red tape. In the beginning, the Capricorn kitten appears to be fitting-in quickly. He or she will be house-trained almost overnight and may only once make the mistake of jumping onto the kitchen table. Later, however, it will become apparent that this feline has trained the family to live his or her own way...doing what he or she wants to do, when he or she wants to do it. Many stray cats seem to be governed by the Sign of Capricorn and such kittens are often abandoned when they are very young...luckily, they appear to adapt quite well to a life in the wild. Personal interaction is important to the Capricorn Cat. This feline's instinctive understanding of human frailty means that he or she will be more than generous in overlooking an owner's shortcomings...perceiving them as trials that this feline is obliged to bear in order to help him or her along the road to success. Constantly hopeful of improving the personal standard of living, however, there is always a strong chance that this cat will move out of his or her present home in order to assume residence in a more affluent household.

Natives of Virgo tend to be the most responsive to the Capricorn Cat. Virgo subjects are generous enough to accept this feline's teachings, as well as being down-to-earth enough to realize when the Capricorn Cat is rising above his or her station. Natives of Libra and Taurus may also find harmony with the Capricorn Cat, but this feline is liable to drive any Sagittarius native to total distraction.

From Cat Astrology

Mama is a Pisces. Gram is Virgo. But they gets human horoscopes, not cat ones. Duh.

HELP US!! We don't know what sign Simone is! She's so new (well, to us), that we haven't decided when her purrthday should be. What sign do you think she is? Mama thinks maybe a Libra.

Tuxedo Tuesday: BY SCOUT

2007-06-26T12:10:00.000-07:00

I've finally taken over Peach's blog for a day. Well, if I can manage to stay awake long enough. You know how it is. Simone (who visits Miss Peach a lot) told me about the MEME over there and I just had to do it fo my first Tuxie Tuesday. So here goes, SCOUT'S INFORMATION PLEASE

INFORMATION PLEASE!!!

1} Favorite season? I live in L.A., it's always summer here.

2} Favorite colors? Black and White (duh!).

3} Favorite room? The one with the TV, my chair, my ottoman, and my Ma.

4} Do you like dogs? Heck, NO!

5} Ever been in an airplane box? No way!!! That's for Peach.

6} Do you have the get bathed? No way, Jose! Just you try and see what happens! Every now and then they wipe me with kitty wipes to try to help my dandruff and I HATE it. But Ma says I have enough dandruff to bread a pork chop.

7} Are you in love? Does cheese count?

8} Where would you like to travel to? Around the room and back.

9} What do you ignore? Peach. He ticks me off.

10} How many lives have you used up? Only one. When I had my kittens and then came to live in my furever home. Since then, I don't take any risks.

11} Do you have any dark secrets? If I told you, I'd have to kill you.

12} What is your favorite holiday? I don't like holidays. People come over and disrupt my routines.

13} Water or milk? Cheese.

14} Why do you blog?Uh, I just take over Peach's blog to annoy him. Plus, I'm very chatty and it's another way to express myself.

15} Are you into extremes? Do I look like a daredevil to you?

16} Favorite TV shows? The Newshour with Jim Lehrer (I like the music) and a close second, BBC News because it means, it's 5pm and time to sit down with my Ma. Other shows that Ma tells me "Scout it's your favorite show": anything that anybody is watching.

17} Are you a pesty lap cat? Oh, yes. A pesty, heavy lap cat. I resent when Ma works on her Swedish Weaving or handsewing because then there's no place for me. Except I don't like it when people wear shorts and I have to sit on bare legs. Yech.

18} Inside or outside cat? Both. I only walk down two houses to my "laughing spot", lounge on the back steps, and go out front to get the newspaper. I don't do anything dangerous. That's why I don't have to wear a leash like Peach does. I'm supposed to get more exercise because I have developed arthritis in my left leg and I limp if I sleep too long. I think exercise is overrated though, both indoor and outdoor.

19} What makes you happy? Brushing. I love brushing. Also cheese. And sleeping.

20} Your most embarrassing moment? I'm a perfect cat. I don't have embarrassing moments.

Now you know lots about me. And you can see that I should sue Peach for slander and libel if I could get organized. Me and Simone want to form an anti-Peach club, but we can't stay awake long enough to put it together. We're a lot of talk and no action. Maybe some you can help us!

Mancat Monday

2007-06-25T14:55:00.000-07:00

Today I am so tired from my advenchur yesterday. That's why I wasn't online much. I went outside without my leash and forgot all about weekend blogging! Didya hear that! Sans leash! FREE TO DO WHAT I WANT, ANY OLD TIME, as the Rolling Stones say. Oh, yes. Grammy felt sorry for me. She said there weren't too many dogs out on the lake, the weather wasn't too hot, and besides, she'd be sitting there all day anyways.
Here's the trick you guys: Just get yourself all tangled up in the lead, look real pathetic, and whine. Pick the weakest bean in your family. That's how to get free! I'm telling ya.

Of course, today the door won't open and I can't figure out why. Mama said if I had a frontal lobe I could figure these things out, but I don't got one, so I'm stuck in a never-ending present. That's ok. I like my life.

I'd also like to clarify. Scout's a widebody. I some of you cats thought she was just fluffy. But she's not. She's a fatty fatty. All 13lbs of her. Here's a better picture of her girth. She's on her favorite chair with the new blue towel (it got bleach on it by mistake, so it's hers before the beans even used it more than twice).

I think I must be the only Mancat who tells it like it is. Scouty is "good gentle soul" sez Mama, but she's also big. This means she can beat me up too, when she feels like it. The other day she chased ME down the stairs. Usually I'm the boss, as you know.

Now I gotta go see if I can that door to open...

I'm so cool! I'm on the innernet!

2007-06-24T14:08:00.000-07:00

Look everybuddy! I got featured on Pet Sale Avenue! I'm the coolest! Told ya so!

Ok, maybe later I'll put up a real entry or maybe I'll be nice and let one of the girls do it.

Fashun Friday

2007-06-22T12:56:00.000-07:00

Here is my new summer wardrobe that grandma made for me. In picture one, you have my "ready for the beach" motif and in picture two, my patriotic 4th of July motif. It's still a little too big and has to be taken in (I got a small neck). Also mama woke me up from a nap to take the pictures, she's so mean. She said she didn't feel sorry for me, because I was so mean to Simone this morning when we were getting brushed and she had to take the pictures NOW. I have lots of other costumes like this with various motifs. For instance, Wild Thing/French Fries, St.Patricks/Valentines, Halloween (that's a double for one holiday, pumpkins on one side and tuxedo kitty paws on the other). I also have bowtie for New Years, and Flag Ribbon for 4th of July and other patriotic holidays. I love to dress up. It makes me feel so energized, so jazzed. Like I could conquer the world!

Beach Motif (Sumbuddy forgot to turn off the FLASH!)

4th of July Motif

Wordless Wednesday--Scout's a Widebody

2007-06-20T12:19:00.000-07:00

I like to live on the edge!

2007-06-19T17:15:00.001-07:00

Just press play! My favorite car, with my favorite theme. It's even orange like me!

Simone on Sunday

2007-06-17T18:40:00.000-07:00

Simone here: I would like to introduce myself today. There have been some questions from Miss Peachy about my eye, so I thought I'd steal the computer from Peach for a while and tell you all about me. First of all, I'd like to point out that I told Peach about the Spell Checker. He's not very well read, you see, and couldn't spell if his life depended on it. I love reading. I help mama with her reading all the time.

Fact 1: Peach did not poke my eye out (I know that's what you all were thinking!). I had a very deep corneal ulcer that could not be treated. It ruptured in April. I had to go to the Cornell Animal Hospital at 9pm on a Saturday night. Mama and Jofish were so worried about me. And it was snowing too. Since I was still Mama's foster kitty at the time, she could not tell the doctors which surgery to give me. I had to go back to the SPCA on Sunday morning. Then the SPCA had to debate for 3 days whether I should live or not. Luckily Vet Tech Karen and Dr. Barry stuck up for me and said I had lots of pizazz left in me. So, instead of this being the end of the line, it was a new beginning. Dr. Barry removed my eye--which had been causing me much discomfort for months. And Mama adopted me officially.

Fact 2: I am a very old kitty. I am probably about 15 years old. I came to the Tompkins County SPCA when my owner died (she introduced me to the golden oldies I love so much). My real brother, Gunther, came with me. But, we both got very serious colds. He was so grief stricken that he died. A little while later I made a good friend of another older kitty, but then I got adopted. My new owners found out that I had hyperthyroidism and they returned me. By that time my new friend had been adopted and I was alone again. Then in March my mama volunteered to give me a break from the shelter. I had to live with Peach, but that was a small price to pay for a comfy bed and lots of cuddles. I went from a depressed kitty who never bathed to a peppy old girl. Then my eye ruptured and I was once again "unadoptable." Thanks to my mama though who loved me enough to keep me for good.

My favorite things: Beef flavored cat food (but not beef flavored medicine--yech, I hate medicine), cuddling, licking my beans, going outside in the back yard, helping with quilting, eating treats at bedtime, old-timey music and movies. I love Edith Piaf. Has anyone seen the new movie about her? I can't wait for the DVD. I obviously don't go OUT to the movies. I also love to listen to music from the war and watch silent films. Scout loves the movies about the war with the bombs falling, but I love the romantic ones. I like it when beans fall in love.

Saturday Caturday

2007-06-16T12:15:00.000-07:00

Yesterday I couldn't post cuz mama didn't even let me turn on the computer. She didn't even let me go OUTSIDE. I just had to stay inside all day. Everybody went and got in the car and gramma told Scout to "hold down the fort." Then they didn't come back til late and said it was STILL too hot for a hairy guy like me to go outside. By the time it wasn't too hot they was all sitting on the couch watchin' tv, so no way was I going outside.

It is NOT FAIR. You know who gets to go outside--SIMONE. I don't know how she gets through the door. No matter how much I cry and scratch that door won't open for me. But Simone is always on the other side of it. Mama sez Simone is more reliable. But not yesterday she wasn't. Yesterday Simone went out the back and came in the front ALL WET. You'd think she'd know that when the sprinkler goes on you run! Sheesh. How dumb is that girl? Mama laughed so hard! At first she though I pushed Simone into the water bowl (why do I always get blamed first?) but then she figured out what happened and laughed and laughed. And then gave Simone her pill. What a bad morning for Simone. No pikture tho, I couldn't find the camera. But she was wet and skinny and you all know what that looks like!

Today I get to go outside because gramma is sewing all day and doesn't want me in the way too much. Plus grandpa feels SORRY for me and takes me outside. Mama sez she feels sorry for me, but NOT THAT SORRY. She'll get over it. Maybe I shouldn't bite her feet in the morning when she has a headache. But who can resist feet under the covers?

Thursday Thirteen

2007-06-14T12:54:00.001-07:00

I LUV Musik as you know so here's the top 13 from my personal Soundtrack (just like in the movies). I'm also up for suggestions. This is only about half the songs on my 2 volume soundrack. Consider it a "Best of Peach: The Soundtrack"

1. Peaches by Presidents of the United States (self explanatory)
2. Wild Thing (ibid--learned that one from Mama!)
3. Put a Lid On It (my mama added that one cuz I meow SO loud sometimes)
4.Putting it Together (hey, art isn't easy)
5.Shake, Shake, Shake, Shake your Booty (my hunting song)
6.Stand by Your Man (cuz I'm the Peach MAN)
7.California Dreamin'
8.Mungojerrie and Rumpelteaser
9. Mess Around
10. Rock n' Roll All Nite (Those last three for singing when I knock things over and go crazy at 3 am, or as Mr. Jofish sez when I go bat****. He uses lots of bad words, but he's English so he can get away with it.)
11.I've Been Everywhere (by my Idol, Mr. Johnny Cash, also, cuz I been everywhere)
12.It's Hard Out there for a Peach. (I modified the real song to suit my needs, for those of you familiar with the version from Hustle and Flow)
13. Splish Splash (for when I hang out in the bathtub after the beans get out or watch when they are in)

Wacky/Wordless Wednesday

2007-06-13T18:53:00.000-07:00

Tuxedo Tuesday--NOT!

2007-06-12T18:53:00.001-07:00

Tuxedo Tuesday--I hijak it. Scout wanted to introduce herself today, but I had an ADVENTURE last night way better than anything she has to say. And she has LOTS to say. She talks too much anyway.

I ESCAPED. I, Houdini. Nobody knows how I got out but I did and I'm not gonna tell how (then they'd know). I heard the aliens calling me around 7pm last night. And then I just had to go outside. and I DID!!! At 10pm, I banged on the door and to everybuddy's surprise, I was on the wrong side. No one even noticed I was gone. Who knows why I decided to come back---I guess I was hungry. Scout told me off when I came in. She said I smelled and that the aliens had been messing with me again. I really shouldn't listen to the aliens she sez. No good can come of it.

Mancat Monday

2007-06-11T15:16:00.001-07:00

For Mancat Monday I wanna introduze my bestest mancat buddy Jimmy Joe. That's me WIDE AWAKE as usual. I don't sleep much. I walk. And walk. And check things out all day long. You never know when a toilet might malfunction and you have to use your special toilet is running meow! Gots to keep on top of these things, ya know. Jimmy he's more of a normal cat. He knows to sleep, purr, beg for treats. I can't do that stuff. I'm awake all the time. I can't purr too good. And I don't beg for treats, I just take! Me and Jimmy are like peas and carrots. We have opposite purrsonalities. He's very laid back. Mama calls him the Great Melon of World Peace. When Jimmy's not sleeping we like to hang out and roughhouse. My favorite "move" is called "I sit on you." I fake him out and then I SIT ON him and win the round even tho he's bigger than me. I leave lots of "Peach Fuzz" and Mama and Auntie Anne get very mad that they have to vacuum up after us.
Best Mancat Buddies Story:
One time we both had to catch a mouse. But we just wanted to eat kibble instead. The humans had to catch the mouse while my Auntie Anne (Jimmy's Mama) hid in the bedroom. She hates mice. I just think they are boring. No catnip inside. Jimmy agreez.

Snoozy Sunday

2007-06-10T18:55:00.000-07:00

I'm havin' fun today getting to know you guys on the Catblogosphere. As I red your blogs I added you to my blogroll. It'll get bigger as I get to know you.

Today me n' Simone n' Scout n all the humans went outside for HOURS. I was on my rope. The NO lady just doesn't understand that I need to be FREE!!! Simone n' Scout get to be free. But I'm "not to be trusted". Simone caught a dragonfly and I played with a bumblebee. Then the NO lady wanted to go swimmin' and I had to come in.

Now I'm tryin' not to be tired. I'm not I'm not. But I can't keep my eyes open. It wuz such a busy day. We're gonna have popcorn! Yum! I luv popcorn!

My mama will post a good picktur of my tail as soon as I cooperate. Not one of my better qualities.

Imawildandcrazyguy

2007-06-09T18:57:00.000-07:00

Is anyone out there watching the horse race? I am rooting for Imawildandcrazyguy! You know why? Becuz I'm a WILD N CRAZY GUY. I have to watch it on TIVO because my mama and my grandma don't like commercials. They watch everything on Tivo. I like horse racing--they have FURlongs. Get it? Today I went outside on my rope. I'm trying to convince the NO-lady (my mama) that I don't need a lead but she sez I'm unreliable. Granddad was fixin' stuff outside so I had to SUPERVISE. That's one of my other careers, professional supervisor.

UPDATE: Rags to Riches won. My mama sez she is "one tuff broad". Well, a girl hasn't won the race since 1905. Lemme tell you about tuff broads...I sure know 'em. (see yesterday's post about the ol' ladies). She's a WILD N CRAZY GIRL!!

MY FIRST POST

2007-06-08T18:57:00.000-07:00

I juz red about Skeezix's blog and said to my mama that I had to have my own. I don no Skeezix, but his blog is cool and he liks fashion, juz lik me! I will post about my liv of fashion later. For today juz introduze myself. I am gorgeous. I am beautiful. I have the best tail of any cat on the planet. I should know. I travel and see things.

I juz got back to L.A. from THE BIG ROAD TRIP. U can see the pikturs at the website of Jofish. The best of all is the trick I pulled getting into the bed springs when Jofish and my mama wanted to chek out of the hotel. They kuldn't find me anyware. He took lots of pikturs of boring things lik the painted desert and the cadillac ranch, but there are some pikturs of ME and Simone.

Simone is the other cat. She is an OLD ladey. She is as old as dirt. Older. Older than even Scout (who is rilly old). She iz one eyed and skinny. Scout is fat. She is a blob. I lik invading her houze. Today she went on the roof. She must be suicidial . I have that effekt on peopl.